On Sunday, we decided to take the kids to the local county fair to enjoy some good ol’ fashioned fun-in-the-sun, animals, rides and cotton candy. We had no idea that his whole event would cost nearly as much as a day at Disneyland! I can very comfortably declare that going to the fair need only be a once every few years event for our family.

The $6 Merry-go-round ride

The day began with parking, and the organizers of the fair are kind enough to give you parking options: you can pay an arm to park in general parking or a leg to park in “preferred” parking! We opted for the $8 general parking. Got parked, lubed up the kids and ourselves with sunblock, threw together the bag of diapers, wipes, camera, etc. We are starting to grow out of the stroller, though this time we should have brought it. We walk throught the dirt parking lot, to a line of people about two blocks long, all waiting to get into the fair. After 40 minutes of waiting in line, my Son whining about how his legs are tired, my daughter doing “Princess twirls” into at least seven other people in line- we were golden, time to go in. We processed easily through the metal detectors and scanning wands, since we didn’t have a stroller this year (and no, we don’t live in Watts or some other crazy violent neighborhood- this is Pleasanton, one of the safest cities in America- guess you can never be too safe).

They won't want to ride the merry-go-round, and yell "Hi Mom!" everytime forever...

So- of course, they put the carnival rides right where you walk in the door, so your kids scream at you “We wanna go on the rides! I wanna ride the ferris wheel! I wanna ride the roller coaster! No, I get to ride the cars! You’re too little, Stupid-head- you can only go on the baby rides! Waaaaaahhhhhh….Mommmmmmyyyyyy….Sister said I can’t go on the car ride…..waaaaahhhhhh”, or something like that, until the parents relentlesly give in and buy a $25 pack of carnival ride tickets.

One would think that with $25 worth of ride tickets, a family of four could each ride a couple of rides. Wrong! We all got in line for the ferris wheel, so that we could ride it all together like the perfect little happy family (Awwww….), until we get to the front of the line, and the Carni-man says, “That will be 20 tickets, ma’am”. “I’m sorry? 20 tickets?” I stammer….that can’t be right- these tickets are a dollar apiece. Oh, I know- he thinks we’re offering to pay for the eight people behind us, we all had whining kids, all around the same age- one might have thought that. I announce to the Carni-man, “no, we’re not with them” I gesture to the people behind us, “It’s just the four of us, ” I say. “Yes ma’am, for the four of you, it will be 20 tickets. Five tickets each, for four of you- 20 tickets please.” I hand him the whole roll of tickets, except for the five little separate ones, because they’re sold as a sheet of 20, but they make you buy 25 so that they can con you, since there is no such thing as a ride at the fair that is less than 3 tickets, so either someone rides by themselves, one extra ride (try doing that with two toddlers- I dare you), or you just toss them, OR (novel idea)- you have to buy more! It’s a scam that would make Bernie Madoff  proud! So, onto the ferris wheel we go (no turning back now, unless you want to see a meltdown of drastic proportions)- and I sat in bewilderment that I had just spent $20 on a 3-minute ferris wheel ride. I tried to comfort myself by placing my family in a Visa commercial that shows the perfect little family at the fair: Popcorn $4, Soda $6, Ferris Wheel $20, a Sunday with the family: Priceless. Priceless my ass! All of the money I made bartending all weekend went to pay for our excursion to the stupid fair!

I'd never seen live horse racing before!

It was hotter than hell, and after a screaming tirade from our kids about how they “wanted to ride more rides than just the stupid ferris wheel!” we were ready to sit down, eat some lunch and have a beer. We were faced with yet another Ponzi Scheme when we bought our two $12 brews, a $9 kid’s meal of corndog and fries, and a $16 beef brisket platter that we shared. After, we went on to look at all of the livestock animals (believe it or not, that was free), then watched some horseracing (again, free, because betting was a $50 minimum, and neither the Husband or I know horseracing from a hole in the ground- so we didn’t dare try at the fair), and then we sat and watched a bunch of drunks and cowboys with spit containers in their hands, ride a mechanical bull. Definitely entertaining!

I picked a winner when I married the Husband!

And then we walked through the commercial exhibit buildings- allow me to forwarn you: Do not enter these buildings if you don’t want to spend money, and/or if you have been drinking and will easily be swayed into believing that a $35 mop will be your answer to a sparkling clean and pristine home or that a $25 piece of rubber with nail-file grit pasted to it will keep your legs and bikini line hair-free in a painless, easy manner….

Tune in for Fair Market Value 2: Soft Silky Legs Review sometime this week!

Introducing another wonderful article from my dear friend, and a beautiful Mother, Allison R. I wish I had read about this before I had my kids- so helpful in breaking down all of the costs, how to save money, and a real-mom’s guide to cloth diapers. Thank you to Allison R. for a fabulously funny, informative and helpful guide to taking poo to the “green” side! ~Kristin Noel

Poo Is the New Green!                                                                            By: Allison R.
In these days of environmental consciousness, we’ve all heard the statistics about disposable diapers in landfills- like 50 million chucked in every day.  But enough with the guilt, let’s talk about something closer to home than the rainforest or the dump.  What if cloth diapers were easier on your bank account, and not just the environment?   So instead of the guilt, let me help you navigate the world (it’s a lot bigger and more diverse than you might think) of cloth diapers and how it is you use the darn things.

I first became intimate with the details (not the messy ones just yet) when I was pregnant.  Our family eats lots of organics, we limit the use of toxic chemicals in our household products and personal care stuff, and my husband has worked for several organic food companies.  I wanted to use cloth instead of disposables, primarily because of the environmental impact, but also because of the desire to have something more natural on my baby.  Disposable diapers are made of plastic, and chemical gels and are frequently bleached with chlorine, and I didn’t want that in almost constant contact to my baby’s skin, especially her genitals.  

When my husband started doing research on-line and found out that the cost of disposable diapers would come to roughly $2,500 during her first two years, he was all for cloth, too, even if it meant changing a few (okay, way more than a few) himself.  $2,500!! I knew raising a child was expensive, but disposable diapers are thrown out!  That’s money covered in crap and thrown away! 

After a bit of research, considering ease of use and availability, we settled on using the gDiaper system, and then ended up modifying it and making it even cheaper in the long run.  Here is a short, and thus by no means definitive, list of cloth diaper possibilities:
Gdiapers- a system that combines cloth and disposable.  They call it ‘the new hybrid’-chuckle, chuckle.  This system consists of a cloth pant with a snap-in plastic liner, and a flushable or compostable insert that resembles the inside of a disposable diaper.  These inserts are available at Whole Foods and at gdiapers.com and cost $14.49 for 32-40, depending on the size.  Because we were living overseas, and shipping would have been astronomical, we went a step further in cutting the cost and lined the cloth pants with old-fashioned cloth and cloth pre-folds.  This of course, means washing them instead of flushing or composting, but we’ll get to those details later.  Here’s why I love them: the cloth pants are doggone adorable, making that cute little bottom even more wiggly and squeezable (okay, maybe I’m nuts, but just look at the pictures on the website, and you’ll see I speak truth) but mostly because they’re easy.  No pins (that’s so last generation) and the Velcro closures make them go on just like a familiar disposable.

bumGenius- these cloth diapers are an All-in-One variety, meaning the cloth and the waterproof outer layer are already put together for you, and you won’t need waterproof plastic pants like you would with traditional cloth diapers.  They can be found at bumgenius.com, and are also conveniently available at Target for $35.99 a pair.

 
Bumkins- this company offers a wide variety of products on its website, bumkins.com, as well as a few at Target.  They carry the All-in-One’s as well as cotton diapers with Velcro closures that also require a plastic cover.  There are plenty of colors, styles and accessories to choose from on the website.
Snazzipants.co.nz- this website that my sister-in-law turned me on to, is really only useful for ordering if you live in New Zealand (and I did a lot of it when I live d there) but more importantly, it is a fantastic, honest resource for what’s out there.  They candidly review and carry products from Canada, Europe and the US, as well as their own brand.  I used the site frequently in writing this article.
Now that you’ve gone shopping, you’re ready to make it happen, with your baby’s help, of course.  Where else did you expect to get the poo?

This is how we do it:
Ingredients:
    15-20 cloth prefolds or flats (thinner, bigger, and not folded)- these can be found online at underthenile.com (4/$34 for organic prefolds), cottonbabies.com  ($1-$2 each for flats) or Target at $10.99 for a dozen flats.
    6-8 cotton boosters- these are dog-bone shaped inserts that can increase absorbency, and are great for a heavier wetting period, especially through the night.
    5-8 pairs of cloth pants- gdiapers sells these as gpants, and has them in a constantly updated and dizzying array of colors.
10-12 plastic liners- these snap into the cloth pants. 2 come with each pair of cloth gpants, and are also sold in pairs on the gdiapers website for $4.99.
For cleaning: A 5-gallon bucket of water with 1 cup of white vinegar, baking soda and eco-friendly laundry detergent.

Minor assembly required:
If you use cotton pre-folds in a gdiaper like we do, then start by snapping the plastic liner into the cloth pant.  Take the pre-fold and fold it in thirds lengthwise, with the thickest part in the middle, then fold a third up in front and fit into the plastic liner.  You may need to adjust this a little to make it snugger.

Cleaning:
If you’ve just got a wet one, rinse the cloth insert in the sink, then dump into your bucket.  You can rinse and dump the plastic liner, too, but if it’s not too damp, it could go another round.  If the cloth pants got wet, dump them, too, but leaks are usually pretty infrequent.
If you’ve got a dirty diaper, it’s going to take a little more work (about three minutes) and some down and dirty cleaning.  Start by washing the plastic liner and let the cloth pants air out, unless they’re dirty, too, in which case, they get washed with the rest.  Just like our mothers and grandmothers before us, I dump what I can from the cloth prefold into the toilet and flush it down, just like the adults doo, I mean do.  Sometimes, I have to jostle it around in the toilet to shake loose stubborn stuff, and once all the chunks are gone, it too, goes into the sink.  Using a little bit of liquid soap (we’ve used Softsoap, Dial, and Dr. Bronner’s Peppermint- which has the added benefit of smelling nice) rub the dirty sides together (so you don’t have to touch anything) rinse, and toss into your bucket.  Some stains may remain, but it’s well on it’s way to getting clean, and either the washing machine or a little added bleach (for cloth only, not the pants or plastic liners) will help.  The bottom (pardon the pun) line, however, is that a little shadow is no big deal- it’s a diaper and it won’t be seen in public.  Don’t be turned off by these down-and-dirty details.  It’s not that bad.  Really.  If you’re going to have to wipe up a dirty bum, cleaning out the diaper isn’t any worse.  And at least the diaper doesn’t wiggle while you’re trying to clean it.  Seriously, once you’ve done it half a dozen times, you don’t even think about it.  You just doo it. (Okay, I’ll stop with the poo-puns.)
And, of course, after all this, WASH YOUR HANDS!
Every two or three days, dump the bucket into the washing machine, with plenty of detergent and a little baking soda, maybe a tablespoon, and wash in hot or warm water.   The best way to dry cloth diapers is the old-fashioned way, out in the sunshine.  Sunlight and fresh air are two of the best disinfectants, and they’re easy and free.   I did this in New Zealand where the air is always moving and almost everyone has a clothesline in the backyard, but here, our yard is small, so I use the dryer.  Drying racks are great, because they’re less obvious and mobile, which is especially nice when it rains.

If all this diaper cleaning seems revolting, and you don’t mind the cost, a diaper service is a wonderful thing, too.  Most diaper services are not much more than buying disposables, and you don’t have to go anywhere.  They pick up and deliver right to you.  A couple that have service to the Bay Area can be found on-line at Tideedidee.com which run about $15/week for 40 cloth diapers w/Velcro fasteners, or Tinytots.com at $18.25/week for 55 prefold cloth diapers. 

I haven’t kept an exact count over the last (almost two) years, but a quick glance at all these numbers have me calculating that by using cloth diapers and washing them myself, we’ve so far (she’s not out of them yet) spent less than $400 on diapers.  And we can use them on consecutive children, too, which of course, you can’t do with disposables.  Eeew.  This doesn’t include the water used (we rent) in washing them, which incidentally is no more than the average adult uses to flush the toilet 5-6 times a day, but it is unlikely that even in drought season, the water bill would tip the scales as compared to going the disposable route.  By going the Green Poo way, we’ve saved over $2,000!  A small chunk of her college education, but at least it’s not sitting, and not really rotting, in a landfill.
So go Green, and save some green!  Everybody’s dooing (last one, I swear) it and it’s so fashionable these days- just think of all those cool hybrids running around full of groceries in reusable bags. Yes, that’s right, poo can be fashionable, too.

Allison R.

Today is my beloved Grandma Pat’s birthday. She is my guardian angel, and so cherished by myself and all of our family. She passed away on April 27, 2004, eight weeks after I had my first baby. My loss at such a fragile time was devastating to me, but it also encouraged me to start writing again. To celebrate my Grandma’s life, today, I had my Grandfather and my Mom over, and we sat on the backyard swing, and laughed and played with my kids, just as Grandma would do, if she were here- though I know she is here in spirit, and certainly in our hearts and thoughts.

Me and my baby Brother, sitting on Grandma's lap, listening to her songs and her stories.

The day that I learned that she was rushed into I.C.U., and was likely on borrowed time, I bundled up my new baby, got to the hospital, spent long hours talking to my Grandma, singing to her, and even snuck her Great-Granddaughter in to be held in her arms one last time. Next to giving birth, that was the most difficult, most taxing day of my life- and my heart had never been heavier. I came home that night and sobbed deep, heaving soul-scouring sobs into the loving arms of my husband. When he and my baby were finally asleep, at nearly 4:00 in the morning, I wrote this to my Grandma:

April 20, 2004             4:12 A.M.

My Dearest Grandma Pat,

My loving guiding light, my beacon when my soul was so lost. My confidante, my dear friend, my listening ear, and cuddling arms. My heart aches for another sunny, fragrant, rose-garden afternoon, sitting next to you on your swing. My soul yearns to have more long talks with you, sharing secrets, dreams, stories and fears.

Hours spent on your lap, in your arms, being loved, being taught, learing the cherishable gift of unconditional love. My precious daughter is cuddled, loved, sung to more than any other baby could be, because I was by you, and those moments are likd drops of gold from Heaven. As I sing to her and look into her deep blue eyes, I reflect on all of the moments that I sat comforted in your arms, smelling your perfume, feeling the soft satin of your robe.

Your strength in both mind and body amaze me. All that you have overcome, never wanting to be a burden, your will and desire to persevere, the miracles that were performed in your life. Your undying devotion to your loved ones, your family, to God, and your friends. Your unconditional love and forgiveness- an enormous lesson in my life. Always teaching me to love fully without abandon, and always to forgive.

I love you so dearly for showing me how precious life is, and how mere moments can offer a lifetime of treasure ; Small troves to open, to remember, and to cherish. Remembering your laughter, learning from your words, and always feeling your love.

Your Loving Granddaughter,

Kristin Noel

Papa misses you Grandma, but we try to keep him smiling!

Today, there are still tears, but there are so many smiles at all of the wonderful, cherished memories that I have of my Grandma Pat. Today, I celebrate her life, and give thanks for the blessings of tradition, memories, and most of all, her love and guidance.

My Grandma, holding my daughter, who is named after her, Easter 2004