Celebs and normal, everyday folk alike, are jumping on board of a trend that fascinates me- vow renewal parties. Heidi Klum and Seal have reportedly renewed their vows and put on a huge wedding-like shindig on their anniversary every year of their five-year marriage. Overkill or simply keeping the romance alive?

Having been married over eight years myself, I have definitely witnessed first hand the “for better or for worse” that manages to weave through the delicate fabric that is marriage. Every year for our anniversary, the Husband and I celebrate another year of wedded bliss by going away, at least overnight, sometimes for the weekend, and we park the kiddos gratefully, at Grandma’s. But, in keeping with the new Vow renewal trend, it seems that our annual jaunt to San Francisco pales in comparison to what some couples have planned for their vow renewal parties.

Is a vow renewal just another reason to be the center of attention and throw a big huge party, or is it a reward for having spent every day of your waking life next to a person who chews his ice so loud while watching t.v. that you wonder how it is that he has any teeth at all, for the past eight years? I’m all for throwing a party, buuuuuuuuhhh-lieve me on that one, but should you get to have a complete wedding do-over after only one, two, or five years of marriage?

My jaw was on the sidewalk as I listened to (okay, eavesdropped on) a mom at the park telling her friend all about her upcoming vow renewal party with her husband of six years- “It’s at the Biltmore in Santa Barbara, and we have 140 guests, and I’m having my second dress fitting at Nordie’s next Wednesday, and ‘my girls’ are flying down next weekend for a champagne brunch and bridal shower, then to have their final dress fittings…” wait a minute, I thought, you’ve been married for six years, you’re your having an enormously elaborate party, complete with seven bridesmaids??? Are you kidding me right now? I was even more intrigued, and tuned-in with my canine-worthy, bartender and mother hearing capabilities and listened closer, “We’re having the bachelorette party in Vail, and since there aren’t any strip clubs actually in Vail, we are flying these guys in from Chippendale’s to give us a private show….” SHUT the front door- you get to have a bachelorette party for a vow renewal? Really? I continued to eavesdrop, “we are having Spago cater the shower and the party, even though it’s going to be about $290 per person, it’s totally worth it- I mean, we have been married for SIX whole years!” Try eight on for size, girlfriend, I wanted to say, but instead continued my spy mission, “….and then my husband suggested Restoration Hardware, which I didn’t even know had a bridal registry, but they do, so we registered there and Williams Sonoma too…” Before I could grab them back, the words just came bubbling up and out of my mouth, “Are you kidding me right now? You have two gift registries for a frickin’ vow renewal? Who DOES that???” I said aloud. Whoopsies. The mom looked at me in utter shock and surprise, and there was nothing I could say, but yell accross the playground, “Alright kids, who wants to go get Dairy Queen?” As my kids came running to follow me like a moth to a flame, I quickly turned and briskly walked to my car.

That night, after three glasses of Chardonnay, and a couple, or nine, episodes of “Say Yes to the Dress”, I was still thinking about the mom at the park and her lavish, insane vow renewal wedding/party/overt display of wealth and/or debt up to her eyebrows, and I was definitely becoming more of a Bitter Betty with each sip. Tipsily, I called out to the Husband, who was in the garage tinkering on his latest remote control obsession, “Come in here for a minute, I wanna ask you something…” I yelled through two walls from the corner of the couch, where I had been watching bride after bride parade around in all of their lacy white and beaded splendor for two and a half hours. “You’re still watching that?” he says as he points to the television. Without answering, I blurt out “I wanna vow renewal, I mean a party for our wedding, you know, for our vows, a party with a pretty dress and crown and girls and champagne and stuff!” I slur, as he looks at me with an expression more blank than a sheet of copier paper. “You know, for our voooooowwwws!” Nothing. I continued, “I mean,like a wedding, but another one, a newer one, for the vows?” I was hazily trying to plead my case. With no response, and like he was backing away from a rattlesnake that he encountered on a hiking trail, he slowly backed away from the couch where I was sitting, then turned back toward me, right before he stepped back into his safe man-cave haven that is the garage, and calmly stated very matter-of-factly, “we already had a wedding- we’re still married, silly!” And with that my hopes and visions of a vow renewal party were dashed upon the jagged boulders of reality.

Though I’ve shelved the idea of a vow renewal party in lieu of a trip to Italy for our 10 year anniversary, though more likely, it will be closer to our 15th anniversary that we’re able to take on such an expense. But, in all honesty, there is still a small part of me that is wondering if vows really are like the brakes on your car, where it’s unsafe to operate your vehicle without having them changed at a certain point, and if you don’t, it can lead to drastic consequences, or is it simply just another reason to throw a party?